Thoughts on Downsizing

It occurred to me that for people who actually get rid of just about everything in order to embark upon a new life, it could be easier to go through the process of downsizing. After all, the tighter the parameters, the less room for indecision. Perhaps I shouldn’t say “easier” because I would imagine it’s still a difficult task.

image

But for people like me, who want to live with less stuff, but the only limitation is whatever I come up with, it can be a very big challenge. My mood and emotions are certainly a factor. Some days, I’m ready to be free of so much of this stuff. Other days, I feel too connected, too indecisive, too unsure of which decision to make.

image

I suppose it’s a bit like forced change. When you must do a thing, you find a way to make it happen. When it’s just self-imposed without external pressure, you’re subject to your own whims and thoughts and feelings and self-discipline, or lack thereof.

I may not have that outside force, pushing me to make this happen, but I will just continue to work around my various moods, my ambivalence, and my lack of discipline to do what I can. Every item gone from our home is a tiny victory, and when combined, they will begin to open up space – both physical and mental. So for that, I will press on.

Purging of the Stuff

Between going through so much stuff in our house for the August Minimalist Game and just thinking a lot about what I do and how I spend my time, I’m recognizing some new thought processes which I think will serve me well going forward.

As I came across supplies I’d purchased for some sort of art/craft project to make for gifts, I began a list so that perhaps I could get some of these made in time for Christmas. Maybe this year, even. But then I looked at what I’d written (only 2 things so far):

  1. Scarves
  2. Ornaments

It occurred to me that maybe the women in my life have enough scarves. I, too, have plenty, but don’t wear that many nor do I wear them that often. Yet, I’m always drawn to them. I’m attracted by the cool colored and textured yarns with which I might make more scarves. Never mind that it’s a challenge for me to crochet due to carpel tunnel-type issues. I have a poncho which I started that will take me quite some time because I can only crochet when I’m not in pain (neck, shoulder, arm, elbow, wrist, and/or hand), so that already limits my crochet-ability and then only when that painlessness coincides with some time to sit and do it. Therefore, I suspect it will take me 3-5 years to finish the poncho for myself.

But I still see awesome yarn at a good price and buy it. What a foolish thing to do.

Pretty sure I should scratch Scarves from the blackboard.

chaos

The above image has nothing to do with anything, except perhaps the chaos of my life because of the things I obtain and allow to suffocate my thought life and space.

Ornaments – Now these might be okay. Maybe people would like more ornaments for their trees. But then again, maybe not. Perhaps it’s because I’m at a point in my life where most of the people I exchange gifts with or would give a gift of an ornament are old enough to have more than enough. Do they really need yet another ornament? I only wanted to make them because it looked like a sort of cool project. And it probably is. Something about shredding up crayons and melting them inside of clear glass ornaments. Maybe this should be passed on for my niece. Or maybe it just needs to go away altogether with the August Minimalist Game. Or whatever. Just out of my house and off my list.

Making gifts can be fun and wonderful but it has to be something which the recipient would really appreciate and enjoy (in my opinion, anyway). It can’t just be because I thought it looked like fun or was cute or cool or whatever. There are plenty of projects to be done that are fun, cute, cool, or whatever. But that doesn’t mean I have to be the one to do them. Especially if it will cause me further pain or just be added clutter to whomever I might gift it.

This is the kind of thinking that goes deeper than just looking at stuff and wondering if I like/want/need it. This is the kind of thinking I need to exercise on a far more regular basis. It’s the only way that my room/studio/office will ever be relieved of the insane amount of crap and that I will have any peace here.